I'm a sucker

So I have a folder on my laptop called "cool shit iLike", and basically whenever I find a picture that is worth right clicking and saving, and later to marvel at..I don't hesitate. So here's a glimpse into my collection:

composed of naked bodies

A closeup of bloodcells

A shocking post card I found on postsecret.blogspot.com

A beach in China

A glimpse into how much ego and drugs can destroy a person. How easy it is to become somebody totaly different, in such a short amount of time.

Return of the 3-D Manatee

I apologize ever so deeply for not listening to you, through these days of cold. I fear nothing but letting go of your lips held between my solemn hands, wringing out your evidence into a dirty, filthy sink. Wasting away your wisdom into another thing of my past, would be suicide on my part, forgive me again. I only live and breathe because of your patience, and your beams of light. That light grows inside of this little girl's heart, dimmed again by my selfish repression, forget what I've said, I'm aware of you now.

Mona Mona

Just a quick sharing experience:
If you like to look at different arrays and portrayals of one subject, and an assload of mona lisa's...this site is for you:
Mona Lisa

Close Your Eyes Mother Dear

About a month ago I was going to enter this writing contest at myithtings.com, and it was supposed to be a piece about what I think beauty is, and what it means to me. I began writing about what beauty is in the world and what it meant to be truly beautiful, but after looking around on the website I realized this was built off of "fashion" sort of deal, actually when creating a profile you can upload pictures of new things that you bought and how much money you contributed to the wasting away of humanity and our planet in general. And I quit the writing!
But overall, beauty is something so questionable to me in the first place. Most days I'm confident with my physical state and being, there has been only one day in my life where I didn't want to go to school because of that visual punctuation [and that was when my face got an allergic reaction from some type of face cream and inflated into a red balloon..it was horrible..moving on.] What I later learned was that I can get more things from life, whether it might be a job, or a free soda, is by my looks. I actually think I learned that recently, thus upsetting more than anything and thinking ONCE again that "gaawd this is a man's world!". That's when I let go of my physical form, and form in general! I stopped shaving my armpits, plucking my eyebrows etc. And not to be counterculture, or possibly so, but to also prove to myself that I am extremely comfortable with the formless things within me enough to fly on.
Beauty feels like such an obvious but such a complicated word to define. "There's beauty all around you!", it's very true, but much more different for me than it is for you. I wish that just for one day we can turn the streets into a completely magical world and we can wear costumes and avant-garde-crazed things, and speak in languages and accents we only dreamed of originating from. So I guess that for me, beauty is an imaginary world, that we bring alive in our minds whether it be in nature, fashion, or just people and their essence. Take it in baby, take it in.

Kiss Me With Your Fever

I am writing to you in a rather dysfunctional, but totally functional form. I think that I am at a higher state of being than I ever have been, and maybe that is my unconsciousness lying to me. Will I ever know the difference?
It's like the only time that I can ever proceed with my writing is in the middle of the glorious night. It's so still. It's as if the only way that my liquid mind can flow is throughout this chill and silence.
I am able to bring myself back from this walking sleep that has created a film around my naked body, and I want to tear it to pieces, wipe it over some other fabricated being. Most of all I want to learn how to be alone, without feeling alone. I think that will only remain in my mindset where I am peaceful, and forgiving of the anxiety within me. I found out that I can control a lot of things with my mind, like hunger, and headaches. I also found that I feel like I can do anything with the world and be impressive to myself. I feel like I have the ability to change the world from inside out, if only somebody would listen. People listen, but I know that many are not capable of proper human interaction. Proper human interaction is, pure, and selfless. I use the words that symbolize most likely something entirely different for you than what they symbolize for me. I look above and see many books, books that I've only half read, and put off for later. So many people are afraid about taking the SAT, and I am really not. If it's judging you on how confident you are with your own intelligence, then shouldn’t you rest easy, unless you're doubtful that you know anything? I think my mind is fully capable of even being a doctor, but I know that my inner Being isn't, just of the thought. Like carving dead people up, I know that that person's body is just an abandoned carcass, and the soul is already gone, transformed into something else. That's another mystery that I am not dying to know. I'm a bit excited to see what it will be. Everyone says that death happens so soon, that you don't even feel it. It must go by so slow, so painful, so torturous. Letting go of your breath, letting it collapse and suffocate your body that once breathed with ease. Makes you want to take a deep breath right? That's what I just did. They need to create a technology that has the ability to hear your thoughts and write down each detail. My thoughts are much too elaborate to write down every single detail; many times their thing that I don’t have the word for, and neither does the world. But that's what we all are, aren't we? A couple of lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, or rather walking around in some type of lost dream, a fast dream. And words are only symbols; the only way to interact with somebody is by becoming close and letting your energy collide together. All of the words in the world hold a feeling or picture in your head. It might be a memory, or it might be a stereotype, which is a memory all in all right? Stereotypes are a bit like scary pictures of people stuck in your head. They’re images that made a huge impression on your mind, a negative or positive one. If there are so many stereotypes about a huge group of certain people, then why do people say that we shouldn't "judge". It's just the way that our mind works. But I don’t stop there, we should all work to take that memory out of each other's minds. Our personal stereotypes are formed on the basis of experience, why don't we all work to eliminate those experiences? That's just the sad part, that we can't work together. Those stereotypes set us apart, forever and on. But don't cry my darling; life is so very beautiful in just that way. That unexplainable way.

V for Violin

Random obsession #1320398230-> listening to violin rock.
Let me begin by clarifying- rock songs played by classical instruments is probably the most god sent and epic movement in music. Just imagine, your favorite rock song played by a symphony, it's so loud and intense, it sends chills up my spine. And that's just a "macro" look into the ordeal, I looked smaller and found myself watching youtube videos of people shredding on the violin. Yes, that corny fucking word, shredding. So go and type in those two words: violin shredding. Watch and enjoy, and wish you played violin like that in your 3rd grade class.

I found this amazingly sexy-voiced girl: Marie Digby. She not only has a sultry voice, but she plays guitar and piano like an angel. And she's gorgeous. Her music choice is a bit questionable, but it doesn't really get in the way of my pure enjoyment of her talents. Here's the link to her video of her doing a cover of Jim Morrison's "You Give Me Something": Marie Digby.

On a more personal note: tomorrow is quite the exciting day for me. I first have school, which is the cherry on top [or bottom] of this day, then a dark photo shoot for miss Gilbert, at 4 I am running off to have a private audition for an indie film "Broken" in the square, and hopefully that won't last too long because then I'm meeting up with my other half to go to a fashion fitting for a local avant garde fashion show. dAmN! Not to mention then I have to figure out how to fit 3 hours of high school homework into the mix. I'm a little panicky because pressure turns me on, and hopefully tomorrow will mean a pressure-filled next couple of months if I land the leading role in "Broken". Plus trying to get a job, take the SAT's and getting a driver's licence.

If We Were All Inebriated Tonight

If I ever get asked the infamous question of "who would die to eat dinner with..anybody in the world?"...type of deal, besides Jim Sturgess from Across the Universe [because he's an obvious oozing pot of sexual eruptions]..I would pick this guy, Phil Hansen. He looks like the most plain looking motherfucker, but god is he incredible. And incredible artist that is. Talented and very genuine, is a good word, for this man. Basically his art consists of using random but very impression-effective objects to create his images, usually of people. From making a layered piece of Rosa Parks using copied pages from a bible...to making a frozen wine portrait of Amy Winehouse, Hansen's creative storage box in the cranium is filled with ridiculously good shit. Here's a video, that you would be dead meat for not watching.
Influence
He is a definite immortal in this world, and I think I'm going to write him some kind of thank you message for all of the inspiration he personally gave to me. If you're wondering about the image in the top of Mr.Hendrix, that one Hansen created out of red, white and black tipped matches, and then set the thing on fire, which I don't know if it's a personal statement on the behalf of Hansen...but I could see his point. Art isn't made to have a definitive point anyhow, to each his own. Check him out: ww.philinthecircle.com